At first, I wanted to write on the summary of my confinement period but knowing that I did not follow diligently all the pantangs, I will skip on writing that piece of story.
Everytime people asked me, how is motherhood so far or how is life after the baby.
My standard answer will be "The first couple of weeks was tough but I'm doing so much better now"
And it is true.
No one has enlightened me with the details of how tough for a first-time parent to handle a newborn nor did I care to read any parenting books when I was pregnant. It was my fault but I know even if I read any parenting books, I would have not anticipate how hard it would be.
So here it is, my share of story.
I cried most of the time, especially when Faliela doesn't want to sleep or crying and I didn't know what to do to soothe her. When Jai started working 10 days after my delivery, everytime he came home he will find me crying, complaining on how the future will be with me having to handle Faliela and he's off to work at night. Complaining how on earth I would be able to complete my PhD. I was regretting my decision of having a baby. And everytime, Jai has to calm me down. I wrote to my bestfriend as well cos I know she won't judge me for everything I wrote.
Jai even noticed how weird my behavior was and asked me one day, 'do you love Faliela?' I answered yes but the truth is, I was emotionally blank. Most of the time, I fed her and quickly handed her over to mom. I don't know what happened to me but obviously my husband noticed how I handle our baby.
Not until few weeks after that, around 3 weeks after I gave birth to Faliela that things started to settle down a lil bit. I slowly talked to her while changing her diapers, holding her frequently than before. Later that I know, I was having post-partum blues. And from conversations with few friends, I realized it was normal and I can blame the hormones for that!
So, I guess what I was trying to convey from this post is it is normal for you to have that kind of feelings after birth and most importantly, you should confide with your partner and discuss your concerns. And to partners, having a positive vibe of your future helps your partner in a way. So, calm her down, assured her everything will be okay.
Yes indeed, everything will be okay in the end :D
5 comments:
Awwww, I bet it is too late for me to comment on this. I didn't know you can have post-partum blues after giving birth. I am glad you are good now :)
I read about this in the newspaper when I was in Malaysia. Actually it was an interview with a Malay woman celebrity (tak ingat nama lagi lah) and she revealed how she was depressed etc after giving birth. She too thought that it was her fault for feeling like that because she thought that every mom should feel very happy and excited over her newborn.
I oft wondered if my eldest sister and/or you experienced this. I guess you did.
I wonder what's the evolutionary reason for such a syndrome.
glad that you are feeling better now. I will make sure that I will be patient and understanding with my wife in the future...haha...
FY:
Yes, I am 100% cured now. Yep, if it is goes longer, it is called post-partum depression. Thank god I didn't have that!
YH:
Err, does it always need to be evolutionary behind every syndrome? Well, not every woman has that. Some didn't and they are lucky! I was emotionally drained in the end of that 3 weeks, but I am good now!
Yeah, make sure you'll remember this piece of writing when your time comes! YH junior, hehe :P
I think celebrity yg share tu wardina, it's good to share so u know it's normal. I guess one of the reason it happened is because our body is too tired physically n mentally. Ada my friend lagi la, siap lari kuar naik keter round2 kl tnggalkn the baby with her mom. But then ok la:)
Kak Mon: Wardina? Alrite, will try to find the article my friend referred to. I agree with you on being tired, it was really challenging the first few weeks as your body was in the process of recovering. Yep, yang penting let it out to someone so that it will relieve your burden a lil bit.
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